Ask Dayton #12 – A Klingon, a Romulan, & An Orion with a Tribble
Question: Dear Dayton: A recent episode of the G & T Show talked about Holodecks being invented for Star Trek Porn (ie. Vulcan Love Slave), and Slash fiction has been a recurring conversation point on the show. And one of your recent tweets stated that you watch Trek porn to check for canon violations. What are your thoughts on the subject? Porn or slash? Slash or porn? Am I the only one surprisingly curious about the topic?
Answer: Porn. Slash. Don’t be so suburban. It’s all entertainment, right?
As a Star Trek storyteller and something of a custodian of the Star Trek mythos, I feel it’s my obligation to examine any story—regardless of medium—in order to ascertain its worthiness to be included in the vast pantheon of tales comprising “the Star Trek saga.” On occasion, this sense of honor and duty has compelled me to review certain prose offerings and, yes, films which fall outside what most people would consider “the mainstream.” The nature of this research often requires me to watch such films twice or even three times. Maybe not the entire film, you understand; just certain key scenes, like the one with Khan and Marla McGivers, when she……….
……….wait, where was I? Oh, right.
Anyway, porn ain’t new to Star Trek. The two have crossed their matter streams more than once over the years, to varying degrees of effect and success. Before that? The fanzine crowd was racing at warp speed into the world of “slash fanfic.” You want to pair up a couple of characters from your favorite show? Put a slash between their names, crib some scenes from an old issue of Penthouse Letters, and we’re off. Roll the dice, hook up anybody and everybody, regardless of gender or species, and let’s see what happens.
You want to reinterpret the woman from “Spock’s Brain” as a dominatrix? Go for it. Should the fight ritual from “Amok Time” have required Kirk and Spock to wrestle naked in baby oil? Knock yourself out. What does Data being “fully functional” really mean, and how much of that do you think La Forge and Deanna Troi know about it? Your imagination and the sky truly are the limit.
Throw in a few sly double entendres referencing “the Captain’s Log,” “the Vulcan Death Grip,” or some variation of “Drop your shields and prepare to be boarded,” along with a reference or three to the Orgasmic…uh, I mean Organian Peace Treaty, and we’ve got ourselves a ball game.[Beavis laugh] Heh. I said “ball.” [/Beavis laugh]
Anyway, to each their own. What a Klingon and a Romulan do to an Orion with a tribble in the privacy of their own holosuite is their own gosh-darned business.
But, wait. There’s more.
He is the co-owner of Busy Little Beaver Productions and is the producer and co-host for G & T Show and Gates of Sto’vo’kor. He’s directed voice actors, and produced and edited audio podcasts and dramas because he doesn’t have the face for video. He plays well with others and is always on the look out for the next project, the next thing, the next next. If he wasn’t working on something with a half dozen other projects waiting in the wings, somebody please check to make sure he’s still breathing.
During the day, he’s a mild-mannered computer repair man who dabbles in web design in his small, rural, Central California community. He lives with his lovingly dysfunctional family and loyal canine companion and spends most of his time in the closet concocting some hair-brained scheme or another. He’s got an unhealthy obsession with Lego video games, Klingons, and Star Trek Online that borders on the neurotic.
Despite all this, he still finds the time to write the words. Find out what he's doing here.
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